Now on DVD!
As I sit at this computer, I see there's an uncut avacado to my right and a bamboo plant to my left. I'm trying to decide, spending almost every moment of free time now on the Internet, which vegetable I resemble most. I think it's the avacado, because it has a sticker that reads "Ripe When Soft," and soft is precisely the state of every muscle in my body.
Of course I have some non-computer time. Like the rest of the Western world, I'm buying TV Shows on DVD like they were precious petroleum. I started with Pete & Pete this summer, but I'm now plowing my way through Scrubs Season 1, Simpsons Season Six, and my mom and I are watching 24 Season 2 together. Apparently I'm not alone--- Rita is hooked on Buffy, Alex on The OC (which my sister is, too, in addition to Laguna Beach), and Kristen's been on the Dawson's Creek train for 2 seasons now including second viewings. Personally, I think DVD lends these shows a legitimacy they don't have when they're being aired for the first time. "Mad About You's on DVD now? There must've been something about that show I missed when it was just white bread for the Friends/Seinfeld Must-See TV sandwich!"*
Speaking of my Simpsons Season Six DVD, have you seen the awful box? It's packaged in a Homer head made out of this really flimsy plastic material-- the kind that kids' toys are packaged in before you throw it out. In fact, it's a bit of a scandal. Read the Amazon reviews. People are angry that their season six won't line up with the previous five, which were all packaged in neat little boxes.
However, when I opened the packaging, I found this little card that reads,
FOR ALL THOSE THAT FEAR CHANGE...
For all those anal-retentive nerds who like their DVD boxes to line up perfectly on the shelf...
For all those who dislike storing their digital media inside a hollowed-out human head, have we got a deal for you:
Just call: *** for a very derivative, old-style, just-like-before box with almost nothing new or creative to annoy or terrify you. Enjoy!
Apparently, if you call the number, a recorded voice just berates you further for being a jerk, then redirects you to simpsonsbox.com. Needless to say I went straight to the website. I must admit a product has never made me feel so bad as this one for being unsatisfied with it. Nevertheless, I did contact them and I'll be getting a boring box in 4-8 weeks, assuming my $2.95 check for shipping and handling clears.
Now I'm going to force myself to go run around a park and throw frisbees to myself before I'm allowed to come back and check my e-mail.
*Actually, I really like Mad About You. Paul, Helen... I'm sorry.
As I sit at this computer, I see there's an uncut avacado to my right and a bamboo plant to my left. I'm trying to decide, spending almost every moment of free time now on the Internet, which vegetable I resemble most. I think it's the avacado, because it has a sticker that reads "Ripe When Soft," and soft is precisely the state of every muscle in my body.
Of course I have some non-computer time. Like the rest of the Western world, I'm buying TV Shows on DVD like they were precious petroleum. I started with Pete & Pete this summer, but I'm now plowing my way through Scrubs Season 1, Simpsons Season Six, and my mom and I are watching 24 Season 2 together. Apparently I'm not alone--- Rita is hooked on Buffy, Alex on The OC (which my sister is, too, in addition to Laguna Beach), and Kristen's been on the Dawson's Creek train for 2 seasons now including second viewings. Personally, I think DVD lends these shows a legitimacy they don't have when they're being aired for the first time. "Mad About You's on DVD now? There must've been something about that show I missed when it was just white bread for the Friends/Seinfeld Must-See TV sandwich!"*
Speaking of my Simpsons Season Six DVD, have you seen the awful box? It's packaged in a Homer head made out of this really flimsy plastic material-- the kind that kids' toys are packaged in before you throw it out. In fact, it's a bit of a scandal. Read the Amazon reviews. People are angry that their season six won't line up with the previous five, which were all packaged in neat little boxes.
However, when I opened the packaging, I found this little card that reads,
FOR ALL THOSE THAT FEAR CHANGE...
For all those anal-retentive nerds who like their DVD boxes to line up perfectly on the shelf...
For all those who dislike storing their digital media inside a hollowed-out human head, have we got a deal for you:
Just call: *** for a very derivative, old-style, just-like-before box with almost nothing new or creative to annoy or terrify you. Enjoy!
Apparently, if you call the number, a recorded voice just berates you further for being a jerk, then redirects you to simpsonsbox.com. Needless to say I went straight to the website. I must admit a product has never made me feel so bad as this one for being unsatisfied with it. Nevertheless, I did contact them and I'll be getting a boring box in 4-8 weeks, assuming my $2.95 check for shipping and handling clears.
Now I'm going to force myself to go run around a park and throw frisbees to myself before I'm allowed to come back and check my e-mail.
*Actually, I really like Mad About You. Paul, Helen... I'm sorry.
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